When Your K-pop Heart Writes Checks Your Body Can’t Cash

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Friends, I’m soooooo tired.

First, we drove round trip from the Bay Area to Anaheim for BTS Jin’s concerts. Each way is about 6 to 7 hours and we made a stop in the middle to pick up/drop off a friend. Then, we stood in long lines as well as stayed standing for both concerts.

My body just isn’t built like it used to be.

I keep mentioning this, but it’s true. And while more proactive people (like my mother) might start exercising and getting their bodies in shape and eating better, that is not my way. My way is to buy as much merch as possible and then get a massage.

So, I did!

Plus, so many people were in town before and after the concert, I felt like I was constantly out and entertaining. Of course, I try to be as much myself as possible, so it’s not like I’m faking my interactions. However, it’s still sustained effort to be an active listener, ask people good questions, consider where to eat or what activities to do, and even though I’m an extrovert, that was a lot of extroversion and truly, I just want to lock myself in a room for a day or two and nap.

As with last week, you will find the following in today’s newsletter (feel free to skip to those parts):

1. Personal note
2. What brought me joy this week!
3. What challenged me
4. What else?
5. Support and love our community
6. Tell me more

Personal note

I will say that if you have to travel for concerts, the first thing you should do once you find out the dates is to book travel and accommodations. These are generally refundable (or you can at least defer for credit), and they also tend to go up in pricing after the concert tickets are sold.

Depending on demand for your concerts, you may want to consider any pre-sales that are available to you through your credit cards, the ticket seller, and fan clubs. Make sure you read all the instructions because that’s how they weed out a lot of people.

When ticketing, don’t panic buy platinum or surge pricing tickets. You can always buy resale closer to the day of. Sometimes, if you buy resale before the tickets are done selling out at the original vendor, you usually can buy them at a lower price than when the tickets are sold out. 

Also, don’t underestimate the underground fan network. There are so many resale groups for tickets, look for them within your own fandom on social media. And of course, if you know a lot of fellow fans, it’s generally better to buy and sell to people you know through your network than some random strangers on the internet.

If this sounds really difficult, that’s because it can be! But the more you do it, the easier it will be.

Truly, nothing in the world will be as much a clusterfuck as ticketing for BTS (or comparable acts like Beyoncé and Taylor). Glad to see that stanning BTS has counted for something practical in the real world. 

What brought me joy

Of course, first and foremost, seeing Jin twice in Anaheim was a decided joy. I lucked out that a friend of mine procured two soundcheck tickets on the first day! I far prefer soundcheck in the first lower level of the bowl than floor because if it’s a raised stage, then you’re eye level with the artist when standing! 

Jin is even more gorgeous in person!! He was so fun, funny, charming, charismatic, and chatted us up like we were old friends. He is a delight.

I currently only have fancams for soundcheck for Day 1 up on my YouTube, but if you want to be notified whenever I post a new video, please subscribe to my channel.

Plus, I can’t believe I got to see Jin’s performance of “Rope It” LIVE. Only go watch this fancam if you can handle seeing both of Jin’s mics. Yes, that is a euphemism. No, I do not regret making it.

Like I mentioned earlier, this week was full of seeing friends—especially at BTS. I’m always astounded at how folks can identify me in a sea full of people while I am wearing a full face mask, hat, and glasses. I suppose I’m one of the few people who still wear masks, but still!

Well, I’m grateful for these folks with high powers of observation. I would be no good as a witness, that’s for sure. 

ALSO ALSO. I found a new writer to obsess over. 

A publicist reached out to me about Isabel J. Kim’s upcoming novel “Sublimation” (on-sale June 2, 2026, Tor Books) which they describe as “Severance” with a twist. 

Here’s the blurb:

When you immigrate, you leave yourself behind. Literally. One instance of a person crosses the border; the other instance stays trapped behind it. 

Some instances keep in touch, call each other daily, keep their lives and minds in sync in the hopes of reintegrating and resuming a life as one person. Other instances, like Soyoung Rose Kang, leave home at 10 and never speak to their other selves again. In America, Rose imagined the country of her birth and the life she would have lived there, but never thought of going back. Until her grandfather dies, and her Korean instance calls her home for the funeral, and she discovers that Soyoung plans to steal her body and live her life whether she wants to reintegrate or not. 

Soyoung and Rose assume that reintegration is permanent—until they see their instanced childhood friend, YJ, promoting a product that reverses unwanted reintegration. YJ could change everything for them, but it would mean putting his job, his citizenship, and his own plans for his reintegrated self on the line.

Sublimation is a literary science fiction novel that pits the lives we choose against the lives we leave behind. It’s an immigrant story like no other, capturing the longing for another life and twisting it into a dangerous game of cat-and-mouse.

Doesn’t this just make you weep reading it?

I got the advanced reader copy (ARC) for “Sublimation” and I’m soooooo excited. Of course, I had to search up Kim’s info, promptly followed her on all her socials, and found a bunch of her published short stories.

“Day Ten Thousand” [CW: death by suicide, attempted suicide] utterly destroyed me (like I literally started sobbing—you’ll know when). Just utterly gorgeous writing. I went on a blitz of her work and now I’m just both so bummed I can never write like her and ecstatic that I found her. 

Finally, some fucking original ideas! Amazing storytelling. I highly recommend checking Kim out. 

Oh, one last joyful occasion. One of my dearest friends—her family’s had the worst run of luck for more than 3 years now—and today, she shared with me some awesome news. They’ve had many false starts, and I can totally understand why she’s cautiously optimistic; she’s been burned too many times. 

I’m hopeful it’s an inflection point in their lives, that after such a long winter, there will finally be spring. Please send them as many good vibes and prayers for her and her family. 

What challenged me

Nothing’s changed since last week. Still plugging away super slowly at “Inevitable” (Book 3), and I don’t know that I’ll be able to publish this year. We’ll see what happens. I have to tell myself to give myself more grace. I’ve published 3 books in about 15 months. I think I’m doing alright! 

What else 

I recently finished “Fetishized: A Reckoning with Yellow Fever, Feminism, and Beauty” by Kaila Yu (on-sale August 19, Crown), and it’s compellingly readable. I’m interviewing her for Mochi Magazine today, and Stella and I are interviewing her for Brazn Azn on Friday. 

Please look forward to the feature and podcast episode in August!

Meanwhile, I would love more reviews on Goodreads for “Illusive” or “Weightless,” the first two books in my K-pop inspired women’s fiction. If you prefer ebooks, I’m also on Amazon. I feel bad for mentioning my books all the time, but really, you know I’m a writer and author, and why can’t I talk about my books?

(This is me reminding myself, not me telling you I should be able to talk about my books.)

I’m so curious, if you have read any of my articles, books, listened to my podcast, or watched my YouTube channel, what did you like about it? What makes you keep reading my stuff? 

I find people’s support both fascinating and baffling. 

I do want to mention that I think I’m a great writer, I just also find it so strange that people want to read what I write because sometimes, I think I write really inaccessible stuff.

Support and love our community

Thank you, friends, for supporting the survey my friend’s 14-year-old kid put out last week. I really do appreciate the ways my community supports my network. 

This week, I’m once again highlighting my friend Erica, who also has had a real shit 2 years. She’s not only had to deal with being unemployed and losing her father, she’s also trying to pack up her life while she moves back to her hometown.

In order to do so, she is trying to raise moving costs through a GoFundMe. If you have room in your budget, I would super appreciate your support of Erica. Any little bit helps, and I think she needs at least another 2.5k. 

I see how uncertainty of the future eats away at my friends. I see how their dignity and self-worth can be eroded over time, no matter how strong their self-esteem initially was. The random unfairness of life can truly cause quite the mind fuck.

I want all my friends—all people, really—to live with security, joy, and dignity. I know it is a blow to their egos to ask for help, and I know it’s both an act of desperation and bravery.

Tell me more

Like I say every week, please gimme all the tea—good or bad, I want it! Thanks for reading, for listening, and for supporting. If there is any way I can support you or your community, please let me know.

May you have a week full of chaotic joy!

Featured image courtesy of HYBE Corporation