Learn Chinese for Kids

Killing the Sun and Other Bad-Assery

Sigh. The kids are ecstatic that there are only three more days of school left. I, however, am mildly depressed. Now that Hapa Papa is here, the urgency and feeling that we’re missing someone has abated. I eat guilt-free. Ah well, I better get to my updates! Here we go:

1) Hapa Papa was putting sun block on Gamera and explaining that he was protecting her from the sun burning her. Gamera replied, “I kill it and make it red. (From bleeding.) I cut it with a knife!”

Later that day, Cookie Monster asked Hapa Papa where the sun was. Hapa Papa replied that the sun was behind a cloud. Gamera piped in and said, “I kick it!”

Because Hapa Papa finds this hilarious, he now constantly asks Gamera, “Where’s the sun?” Some of her other replies have been:

“I jump high and kick it!”
“I kill it dead!”

I blame Hapa Papa and him letting the kids watch him play Halo. Bastard.

2) In addition to her vendetta against the sun, Gamera has also been talking about 烏雲 (Wu Yun/Dark Clouds) and how it blows. Then she says, “I cut him and make him red and he’s dead.”

I thought it was some story she heard at school so I asked her teacher about it. Teacher Nancy had no idea what I was talking about and asked Gamera where she heard this story. To which she happily replied, “iPad!”

Parenting FAIL. facepalm

3) Cookie Monster doesn’t want to be left out so he says he wants to hit the rain in the arm.

4) The other day, a little boy was talking to Bebe and Gamera sidled up behind Bebe and straight up mad dogged the nice little boy the entire time.

This is not an isolated incident.

Another kid pushed her and she came crying to me and I told her to tell the kid she didn’t like that and to stop. So Gamera ran back to the kid and said forcefully, “Stop! I don’t like that!”

5) Gamera is straight up gangsta.

6) As of a few days ago, all the kids have now wet the bed. Cookie Monster peed thru his pullup twice. Gamera peed after she woke up from her nap. (She missed the pee pad but managed to pee all over the blanket and sheets.) And Glow Worm had just finished taking a bath, crawled away from me on the bed after shoving his foot in butt paste, smearing it all over the sheets, then peeing all over the top of the bed by the headboard while I was cleaning off butt paste.

7) Finally made it to 師大 (ShiDa) night market. Hapa Papa stayed with the kids while Fleur and I snuck out. It was a lot of food and clothing. We ate two shaved ices and bought out a guy’s 粉粿(fen guo) stock. Mmmmm.

8) We went to a specialty mah jong store (東方不敗/Oriental Undefeated) for a fancy mah jong set and sticks but they didn’t have any. The shop was tiny. So disappoint.

9) Glow Worm has had two more minor allergic reactions. I am not clear what was going on but he threw up once and the other time, his trunk broke out in a rash. Regardless, his face is always so clear and better the morning after taking Benadryl.

10) The older kids learned about the Swiss earlier this week and when we asked them what they made, Bebe replied that they drew a Swiss flag hat while Cookie Monster said they made ambulance hats.

20140806-110354-39834567.jpg

11) The kids have gotten used to eating with a floating table and stools because Glow Worm will squeeze under the table and push it and the chairs around as the kids are sitting there, trying to eat.Fleur, calls him The Kitchen Table Troll.

20140805-182623-66383561.jpg

20140805-182623-66383228.jpg

Alright, that’s all for today! Four more eating days left!

20140806-110856-40136634.jpg

Author

Virginia Duan is the entertainment editor for "Mochi Magazine," a freelance writer, and an Asian American author who writes stories full of rage and grief with biting humor and glimpses of grace. She spends most of her days plotting her next book or article, shuttling her children about, participating in more group chats than humanly possible, and daydreaming about BTS a totally normal amount.

Comments are closed.