As many long time readers know, my mind retains the dubious talent of going from A to Z in about half a second. As a result, my brain is always flitting from one thought to the next and sometimes all the incumbent possibilities of each idea. It is exhausting. 

Also, it makes it very difficult to write a focused opinion piece on a topic. At least, lately it has. The only time I have been able to write a long focused piece has been when I have a very specific topic (like my Chinese Immersion blog articles) because there is clear direction and mostly information versus open-ended opinion. (Alright, I do editorialize, but everyone knows that even “non-fiction” writing still is biased and presents an opinion.)

As a result, it has been near impossible for me to write anything remotely resembling honest or authentic. Add to that my recent feelings of being closed and invulnerable and everything I write comes off flat and meh. 

Unless, of course, I am delineating the chaotic thoughts of my overactive mind. 

Anyhow, this is just a long preamble to another one of my disparate posts. So, without further lead up, here we go:

1) How is it that it’s my third kid and I still have no idea how to potty train? I’m getting owned! 

Mostly, we pantsless potty train here so at least I get a lot of naked baby butt. Mmmmm. But that also means I get lots of poop surprises. Especially since I forget about Glow Worm and then go upstairs and come back to him desperately trying to show me his poop. He has even decorated his poop. I’m afraid I find it hilarious. And gross. But mostly hilarious. 

2) Gamera woke up yesterday morning and barfed all over Hapa Papa, herself, the bed, and Cookie Monster. She had even pooped in her pullup. She also had a slight fever. This never happens so clearly, she had a stomach bug. 

She also pretty much barfed up everything she ate yesterday (as well as multiple times in the car all over herself and the carseat). Needless to say, I have been doing a lot of laundry. 

3) In addition, Cookie Monster has been randomly breaking out in hives almost daily or every other day since mid/late-July. I finally took him to the allergist and it looks like Cookie Monster has chronic hives. The doctor says he has no idea why but about 25% of the population has it and I basically have to drug Cookie Monster for at least a month. And even then, he may still break out into hives. 

At least it isn’t food related (which is always a concern because Cookie Monster is allergic to peanuts). The doctor says if it’s food related, onset is always between 5-10 minutes after ingestion. 

4) Incidentally, Gamera is totally milking her sickness for all it’s worth. 

5) Also, no more caffeine for me. I’m shaking and my heart rate is elevated after having an Earl Grey iced tea. Clearly I am an amateur caffeinator. It’s been hours and I still feel shaky. Pathetic. 

6) I buy a lot of used clothes and toys for the kids so the kids are used to having things that are not brand new. I’ve never been worried about them feeling “poor” because they don’t have that concept. 

However if I were ever inclined to worry, I should be reassured by Gamera’s reaction to getting new to us clothes and toys from our friends.  She thinks it’s because they love her and sees them as reminders of her centrality to the universe. Who am I to disabuse her of that notion?

7) A few weekends ago, we went to Sacramento and visited one of Hapa Papa’s best friends, Psy. While we there, Cookie Monster asked Psy to help him in the bathroom because he had to poop. 

As Psy was waiting by the door, he kept asking Cookie Monster, “Are you done yet?” 

Every time, Cookie Monster would reply, “Not yet!” Psy would wait about five seconds and then ask again. 

Eventually, Cookie Monster had enough and yelled, “Stop asking me!” Of course, Psy waited a bit and then asked him again. And then Cookie Monster yelled back, “Yes!”

Nothing like exasperating almost six year olds. Heehee. 

Of course, guess who now nonstop asks if I’m done pooping? He even said he was being like Uncle Psy.

Well played, Psy. Well played. I WILL REMEMBER THIS. 

8) Sometimes, I feel as if my kids are in a food scarce world because I never have any nutritional food for them. I know it’s not the same so no need to lecture. I just mean that I never have any idea what to feed them. And they must be nutritionally bankrupt. I know this because as soon as I gave them a good multivitamin, they actually started growing. Yes, even Glow Worm

All right. That’s about all I am capable of writing today without becoming totally useless as a person. Happy Wednesday!